How to be happy?

Is it time for a reworking of this (reputedly) Chinese saying?

"If you want to be happy for a day, get drunk 
If you want to be happy for a week, kill a pig
If you want to be happy for a month, get married 
If you want to be happy for life, have a garden"

In this world of Health & Safety concerns about binge drinking, suggestion 1 can no longer be recommended.


As for suggestion 2, it may well be considered OK if you're a Bear Grylls wannabe faced with that or starvation, but if you're just on some weird voyeuristic reality TV show featuring people in bikinis looking hungry, I don't think it works for me. The pig was virtually tame, for goodness' sake. 

No further comment on Suggestion 3

And now I'm old and grey, I'm allowed to sit and admire my small garden and take delight in seeing healthy bees do their normal bee things while in the rest of the world, the mighty agro-industrial business does it's best to kill off the natural world around us. We need more bees.

But luckily there are plenty of variations on the theme:

"If you want happiness for an hour -- take a nap. If you want happiness for a day -- go fishing. If you want happiness for a month -- get married. If you want happiness for a year -- inherit a fortune. If you want happiness for a lifetime -- help someone else." 

Or try this

"If you want to be happy for an hour, get drunk; If you want to be happy for three days, get married; If you want to be happy forever, make a garden"

Curiously, the English version is quoted as being:

"If you want to be happy for a year, plant a garden; If you want to be happy for life, plant a tree"

Some would say that getting a puppy would do the trick